The mother of a newly diagnosed diabetic child has had it with her husband and stepchildren, and she’s not the evil stepmother in this situation. The distraught woman took to Reddit’s “Am I The A—hole” forum to explain a frustrating situation she’s dealing with in her family, and to ask the all-important question: AITA?
She gave context of her family unit, explaining that she and her ex-husband share custody of their 11-year-old son, who was recently diagnosed with diabetes. Because his diagnosis is fairly new, the mother shared that she and her ex are still figuring out how to help their son manage his condition so he can live as close to a normal life as possible.
She went on to write, “His stepdad is responsible for dropping him off/picking him up from school since his stepsiblings attend the same school. The issue began when my son started asking me or his bio dad to take him to school instead of his stepdad. He said the reason for that is because his stepsiblings open his lunchbox and take all the additional snacks that he needs in case he had a hypoglycemic episode (that’s what we call ‘low blood sugar’).”
As the wife of a Type I diabetic, this makes my blood boil. It’s incredibly important to have snacks on-hand in case his sugar levels drop — if he’s unable to stabilize his levels, he could pass out and even have seizures and die if it’s an extremely severe case. The same instance is true for this woman’s young son.
She continued to explain, “His stepsiblings would take his lunchbox from him and take the snacks and only leave him his sandwich and water. His stepdad thinks there’s nothing wrong with ‘sharing’ although I explained to him about a million times how important his snacks are. He promised that he won’t let his kids touch my son’s lunchbox from now on and I believed him.”
This stepdad is clearly not understanding the fact that his stepson has a medical condition and literally needs his snacks in case of an emergency. Sharing has absolutely nothing to do with this situation — he and his children should respect the boy’s health needs and be grateful they don’t face the same life-altering challenges.
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The mother went on, writing, “Days ago, my son came home and told me his stepsiblings took his snacks from his lunchbox again. I was enraged [and] I asked if his stepdad saw them, he said yes and he scolded him when he refused to let them have the snacks. I lost it, I blew up at my husband and told him that my son won’t be riding in his car again with his stepsiblings after what they’d done and after he allowed it. I told him that my son’s father will be driving him to and from school from now on.”
A completely valid reaction given the fact that she gave her husband and his kids another chance, and they once again acted as if it were a blow-off topic. Not only is it rude for the stepsiblings to take their stepbrother’s snacks in the first place (like seriously WTF is that about in general), but it’s insanely callous and self-centered of them because he needs the food to prevent him from having a serious medical reaction. I can’t believe this woman is even having to go to these lengths to try to get her husband to understand this.
She continued, “He lashed at me saying that I was driving a wedge between the kids and teaching my son to grow up being selfish and self-centered and anti-social…” (HE’S the one who’s self-centered?!?!) “… And also making my son distant from him and getting him to favor his bio dad. I refused to discuss it [and] now he’s acting all hurt and disrespected saying it was not worth ruining the kids’ relationship over some snacks.”
Woooooooow wow wow wow this is NOT about the snacks! This is about the fact that a little boy has a severe medical condition that he and his parents are still adjusting to, and certain foods will help him avoid a hospital visit in case of an emergency.
Speaking from secondhand experience with my husband, it is not at all uncommon for blood sugar levels to plummet unexpectedly, especially in instances of physical exertion or long periods between meals. I would venture to say my husband deals with his levels dropping at least once a day, and he’s been living with diabetes for a decade, unlike this newly diagnosed child.
I’m not the only serious PO-ed person in the know of the situation — Redditors flooded the comments in support of the mom, and they had plenty to say about the unsympathetic stepdad. One user summed it up perfectly, writing, “Unless your husband has some kind of rare cognitive impairment that means he doesn’t understand the meaning of ‘medical condition,’ he’s the one who’s the AH here, not you.”
Another person channeled their secondhand rage into their response, writing, “NTA, holy mother of all incomprehensible f—ks. It is medical, your partner refuses to teach his own kids and takes it out on your kid who is the victim in this. If your partner can’t take responsibility in making sure your child is well taken care of, as you do for his children, you should really reconsider where you are standing in this relationship IMO.”
Another Redditer wrote, “If it’s not worth ‘ruining the relationship’ between them, he should STOP THEM. His ‘hurt reaction’ is infuriating — your child’s health is the most important thing, not his feelings on being held accountable. It’s not antisocial to take care of your health (what ridiculous excuses).”
They continued, “A newly diagnosed diabetic child has major daily responsibility and everyone should be supporting him, helping him to stay safe and healthy and learn these habits. That’s a good family dynamic to foster — not ignoring his condition. It’s incredibly dangerous to disregard it. Oh, and it’s not ‘SHARING’ when you TAKE the items — that’s STEALING.” Yes, Reddit advocate, go off!
If this caring mother can’t get her ignorant husband to get with the program, we hope she kicks him to the curb — both she and her son deserve much, much better.
Before you go, check out these unbelievable stories about Reddit’s worst dads.
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