Penis enlargement questions answered from putting it in a vice to apple juice

Wanting a larger penis is a male trait that stretches at least as far back as ancient Greece and, according to Freud, carried through to the present with the advent of todger-shaped skyscrapers and ego-boosting sports cars.

However, you should know that the size of your penis does not really matter. If you do not have an outstandingly small penis or a medical micropenis, you could be better off spending your hard-earned cash on a good therapist.

But hey, if you don't have the money to build a skyscraper, and you think your package is outside of the typical range of four to eight inches – there are a few proven ways to gain some length and some confidence at the same time.

Equally, there are lots of snake oil merchants out there preying on desperate men looking for answers. So if you are one of the thousands of men who recently googled whether apple juice could make your penis bigger, I have some bad news.

Does apple juice affect the size of a penis?

Unsurprisingly, drinking down the sweet golden nectar that is apple juice will just make you healthier and not lengthen your penis – or the cider-swilling Cornish would be famous for "bigger" things than pasties and mining.

Apple juice contains a variety of vitamins, sugar, and immune-boosting polyphenols – but nothing that could give you an extra inch.

Supplements and vitamins will do little to nothing to change the structure of your willy, though the apple juice might make you go to the bathroom more. In fact, ridiculous claims about anatomy are best ignored in favour of actual medical advice.

What are the best methods to improve your penis size?

As far as current medical science goes, there are really only two methods for lengthening your penis.

The non-surgical option is to place your penis in a vice for four hours every day for six months, while slowly increasing the amount of stretch you are willing to endure.

In a presumably bizarre study, scientists discovered that six months in a vice could give men an extra 0.67 inches in length.

If you do not have a spare four hours every day to stretch your penis in some medieval torture device, the only other proven option is surgical.

Some "phalloplasties" will take fat from another part of your body and inject it into your shaft to gain some extra length and circumference.

Others inject a moon-shaped silicone disk, that helps with girth and length, into the shaft of the penis.

These options are relatively new, but have been proven to work.

These surgeries are especially important for men who could suffer from a medical "micropenis", which is any willy under 2.75 inches when erect.

But far and away the safest, easiest, and cheapest way to get a larger member is to just lose some weight.

The fleshy padding of your pubic area could be overshadowing the more important bit of flesh between your legs. So please, go for a run before you put your penis in a vice.

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