Cameran Eubanks hasn’t changed her stance on being “one and done” with kids.
“I was on the fence about having one in the first place and again when [husband Jason Wimberly] got down on his knee. I said, ‘Hold up. Just so you know, if kids are a non-negotiable for you, you can’t marry me because I might not give them to you,’ ” the Southern Charm star tells PEOPLE in an exclusive interview of her initial back-and-forth mindset about having children.
” ‘The last thing I want you to do is resent me or us end up divorced because you want a child and I don’t,’ ” she recalls of their conversation. “He said, ‘Cameran, if it happens, it happens, but if not, I love you and I want to marry you.’ “
But it did happen, as the couple would go on to welcome daughter Palmer Corrine in November 2017, three and a half years after tying the knot.
“I got pregnant the first time he watered the seed,” Eubanks jokes of her husband, an anesthesiologist. “I literally was like, ‘Okay. Go for it.’ “
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Cameran Eubanks Says You Can’t “Have It All” as a Mom: We “Have to Shatter the Myth”
Eubanks’ second thoughts about starting a family came not from wanting to “appease” her husband, but the idea that she might only have so much time if she wants to do it biologically.
“I started thinking, ‘What if I regret not doing it?’ And I was 33, and they tell you when you’re 35 you’re advanced maternal age, which is ridiculous because you’ve got people having their kids in their 40s now,” she tells PEOPLE. “I thought to myself, ‘What if my eggs aren’t good, or what if I change my mind three years later and then I can’t get pregnant? Am I gonna regret this decision?’ “
“Then I thought, ‘I know when you have a child you have that unconditional love, and I’m never going to regret having a child, but I might regret not having a child,’ ” Eubanks explains.
The Bravo star is firm about Palmer being an only child, sharing that “a lot of it is me having the self-awareness to know that one is all I can handle with my personality, and it’s okay to admit that, and it’s okay to admit to yourself and know what you can handle and know what your limits are.”
“The big thing [I hear] is, ‘Well, you need to give her a sibling. That’s so selfish,’ ” Eubanks says. “And I say, ‘I can either give her a sibling or I can give her a sane mother.’ And I think giving her a happy, healthy, mentally sane mother is way more important than a brother or sister that she’s probably gonna fight with anyway.”
Despite the difficult parts of parenting, it’s worth the “love you cannot describe” when a child enters your life, Eubanks says — but that doesn’t mean she isn’t envious of child-free people from time to time.
“I see my friends that don’t have kids that are lying out on the beach on Saturday, and I can’t lie. I’m jealous,” she admits. “There’s a lot to be said [for] not having children. My anxiety has gone through the roof. I’m stressed out. For as many of the positive things that it adds to your life, it does add some stress. Because as much as you love [your child], you’re constantly worried about them.”
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